1.800.273.8255
Yesterday I heard some news that really shook me to my core. Jimmy, one of my first friends that I talked to in college had committed suicide. When I heard, I took a seat, Let out a sigh, and drank some Bourbon on his behalf.
I cannot express what I am feeling right now. It is somewhere between sad, angry, and concerned. I am so happy that I had the opportunity to meet you. You were the first coworker that I had clicked with when I started working. The laughs that we had when it was you and me in the truck were unbelievable. You almost made me wet myself one time. I would like to share this memory and hope that everyone will see something other than a name on the obituary page.
It had to have been at least a few years back. It was the first summer where I was able to work for a company. Let me set the scene. I was 16 or 17, so the year was about 2012. It was really hot outside as it often was during the summer, and we were working near Trinity Hall, which is the name of a dorm where I used to go to college at a University. We finished the job before what was to come, so you called the boss.
Apparently, the people who were staying in the dorm over the summer did not know how to separate the garbage and recycling. Our job was to clean out the garbage cans, and man did they stink. While we were working, I remember just dying of laughter with the all-out ridiculousness of the situation, and you told me this story. I still remember it to this day, so here it is. I doubt I can tell it the way that you did so I will try my best to give you all the gist.
We were taking a break from the rancid smelling garbage when you talked about this day when you were in class. I don't really remember the details, but I think you said that you were sitting in biology, and the Professor or teacher was talking about something that disturbed some of the class. You told me that this girl raised her hand and said something about it being "Grotesque." Or something along those lines. The mature person that I was just started laughing so hard I could not even breathe. Like I had to sit down, to regain myself. It would have been funnier if you all were there.
Over the years we started to drift apart, but the memories that we made together will stick with me for at least a while. I can still picture you in my mind. All the quirky things that made you, you. I mean you were really funny, loved fireworks (Like I do), loved country music. I remember singing along with the radio with you. Though your voice wasn't the best, it was still a ton of fun just chilling in that weird smelling truck.
Then life happened. Who knows what happened. I do know that you had had a long few months at least and it apparently pushed you over the edge. They say you drove to one of the forest perserves, maybe just to slow down time for a bit, or get a bit of peace. You took a gun, put it to your brain, and pulled the Trigger. Bang! The shot heard around at least part's of the US.
The scene goes black. I hope it was worth it. Maybe it was just too much in a short period of time. I don't know what was going on but apparently it pushed you over the edge. I found this out at 6:00 yesterday. This friend ended it and didn't know where to turn.
But there was still hope. I hear about this suicide hotline. The number is the title of this post. Maybe if you took the time to examine your options, you wouldn't have done it, but you can't change the past. Maybe just maybe you would have sought out some help. I know any of my friends could have answered the call. Maybe you could have taken a 10,000-foot view to see what really mattered. Or, maybe you tried that, but it didn't work. I think about those you left behind, and those even though you didn't see it, you made an impact on. I right now can think of a whole campus that you had an impact on. Included in that is me.
To a fallen comrade.
RIP James,
RIP
I cannot express what I am feeling right now. It is somewhere between sad, angry, and concerned. I am so happy that I had the opportunity to meet you. You were the first coworker that I had clicked with when I started working. The laughs that we had when it was you and me in the truck were unbelievable. You almost made me wet myself one time. I would like to share this memory and hope that everyone will see something other than a name on the obituary page.
It had to have been at least a few years back. It was the first summer where I was able to work for a company. Let me set the scene. I was 16 or 17, so the year was about 2012. It was really hot outside as it often was during the summer, and we were working near Trinity Hall, which is the name of a dorm where I used to go to college at a University. We finished the job before what was to come, so you called the boss.
Apparently, the people who were staying in the dorm over the summer did not know how to separate the garbage and recycling. Our job was to clean out the garbage cans, and man did they stink. While we were working, I remember just dying of laughter with the all-out ridiculousness of the situation, and you told me this story. I still remember it to this day, so here it is. I doubt I can tell it the way that you did so I will try my best to give you all the gist.
We were taking a break from the rancid smelling garbage when you talked about this day when you were in class. I don't really remember the details, but I think you said that you were sitting in biology, and the Professor or teacher was talking about something that disturbed some of the class. You told me that this girl raised her hand and said something about it being "Grotesque." Or something along those lines. The mature person that I was just started laughing so hard I could not even breathe. Like I had to sit down, to regain myself. It would have been funnier if you all were there.
Over the years we started to drift apart, but the memories that we made together will stick with me for at least a while. I can still picture you in my mind. All the quirky things that made you, you. I mean you were really funny, loved fireworks (Like I do), loved country music. I remember singing along with the radio with you. Though your voice wasn't the best, it was still a ton of fun just chilling in that weird smelling truck.
Then life happened. Who knows what happened. I do know that you had had a long few months at least and it apparently pushed you over the edge. They say you drove to one of the forest perserves, maybe just to slow down time for a bit, or get a bit of peace. You took a gun, put it to your brain, and pulled the Trigger. Bang! The shot heard around at least part's of the US.
The scene goes black. I hope it was worth it. Maybe it was just too much in a short period of time. I don't know what was going on but apparently it pushed you over the edge. I found this out at 6:00 yesterday. This friend ended it and didn't know where to turn.
But there was still hope. I hear about this suicide hotline. The number is the title of this post. Maybe if you took the time to examine your options, you wouldn't have done it, but you can't change the past. Maybe just maybe you would have sought out some help. I know any of my friends could have answered the call. Maybe you could have taken a 10,000-foot view to see what really mattered. Or, maybe you tried that, but it didn't work. I think about those you left behind, and those even though you didn't see it, you made an impact on. I right now can think of a whole campus that you had an impact on. Included in that is me.
To a fallen comrade.
RIP James,
RIP